Every breath is another step of faith, Part of me still likes the ground where I feel safe and sound... but you push me, pull me and I finally let go. "Falling" by Travis Cottrell.
The moment that we take the step of faith and become a Christian, something happens... our lives have a purpose... a higher calling if you will.
It took me about 9 years and getting rid of the baggage before I actually began to understand what I truly wanted to be. I am still fighting the battle of self-doubt... there are days that are better than others...
Jeremish 29:11 was always a favorite verse because no matter how much I was floundering in life, it was an encouragement that I had a purpose... I was made for something great. The verse tells is: For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. God can do great things in our lives if we are open to Him!
A couple of Sundays ago, our pastor was sharing a message on being open or obediant to God's will. He used the calling of the disciples in Luke 5... He sees Simon's boat and because there are so many people surrounding him, he asks Simon if he can go out on the water with him. After Jesus finished speaking, he told Simon to go to deep water and cast his nets. Simon, who has been fishing all night looks at Jesus and tells him “Master, we’ve worked hard all night and haven’t caught anything. But because you say so, I will let down the nets.”
Because you say so... Simon had just met Jesus and was open to what he had to say... needless to say they caught so many fish that the boat was beginning to buckle under the weight... they had to call in another boat to help the bring in their catch. It is then that Simon realizes who he is talking to... he tells Jesus to leave him because he was a sinful man... Jesus tells him that he will now be a fisher of men. When they reached shore they left everything and followed him.
These men had just met Jesus and yet they were willing to leave their livelyhood to follow him... without question. I know that I cannot say that... I question everything, even if I know that God's placed this calling on my life... I'm more like Moses, making excuses than Simon, James and John who left everything and followed Jesus.
The first thought that comes to my mind is "I'm too young, no one will listen to me." He gave me the verse in I Timothy 4:12 that says Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity. Another thought that came to mind was "I don't have the right education, or I don't like speaking in front of people... I can't do that... I bet you can guess which verse popped into my head at that thought... yup, Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.
I would use the excuse of work... I have a job, I can't finish this study... suddenly, I find myself being let go from my job. I was "blessed" with 5 months to finish a study that was about 3 years in the making. As soon as the study was completed, I found work at a consignment store, followed by a job offer with UPS. It's funny how God works, and even though I complain, make silly excuses and falter at times, He wants to use me to reach people. It's a scary thought sometimes, but the words of Travis Cottrell's song I'm Over encourages me... I've lived so long in darkness. Fighting all I believe. I've questioned everything you are, but faithful as the morning star you never leave. I'm over living life in fear and doubt. I'm over I won't resist the one I can't live without... I'm over. I don't know why you chose me. Knowing I would be weak. But just I am torn apart, you run to me with open arms and hold me. I'm over living life in fear and doubt. I'm over I won't resist the one I can't live without... and I know you love me, even when its hard to see. I'll follow and choose to say, I'm over. You never said it would be easy, but you promised that you'd stay. You give me rest, and you will be here with me, You'll never walk away. Fighting, Doubting, losing, drowning, running, fearing... I'm over living life in fear and doubt. I'm over I won't resist the one I can't live without... and I know you love me, even when its hard to see... I'll follow and choose to say I'm over.
Will we be like Simon and be willing to leave everything that we know, everything that we find comfort in and be open to His will? or will we be like Moses and make excuses to sit in our complacent rut? The choice is yours... it's scary, but be encouraged that when you step out on faith, God will be right there beside you, he's always faithful!
Be encouraged this week!!! I leave you with the song Faithful God by Travis Cottrell
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